Trying to take this all in one day at a time. Its so hard.
Im confused! I dont understand a lot of my feelings for the past few days. Going through T has allowed me to feel things that I have never felt before. These feelings scare me. Many things I've blocked out and still dont remember all the details to certain situations. Then others I remember as if it were yesterday. My therapist told me that is a protection mechanism that has allowed me to survive. She also told me that I disassociate too. Never paid attention to that until she brought it up. I have a friend that I'm very close with, tell me that she has noticed that I go into what she calls lala land. I pretty much just check out. Once I check back in, I can sometimes figure out why I left. Then other times I have not even the slightest hint as to what triggered me.
I find that living alone is very difficult for me (emotionally & mentally)I dont even know where to start taking care of myself. I'm used to caring for other people that I've neglected to take care of the most important person and that is me.
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I also do the "checking out" so I can relate.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry that you find living alone so difficult. Over time I hope you learn to look after yourself as well as you've looked after others.
Thanks AD!
ReplyDeleteI know I will be better in time. Its the getting there & figuring out how things are supposed to be that is so freaking confusing to me.
i have that same problem---always taking care of everyone else and ignoring my needs.
ReplyDeletei gave you an award on my blog--
http://pictureofexperience.blogspot.com/
Take it one day at a time...best advice I can give you. Things will turn around in time. Find ways to get yourself involved with things so your not alone so much. You have things to keep you busy to fill that void in your life.
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